ted – always goes for the obvious joke

I can take or leave Family Guy, it has its moments but after several years on our screens the formula is starting to wear thin, but I approached Seth MacFarlanes live action debut as openly as possible, already with a fondness for the story hoping it would deliver. Unfortunately MacFarlane takes a nice idea for a story and develops it backwards into a standard fare plot that always goes for the obvious joke.

John Bennett is a lonely kid that even the unpopular Jewish kid doesn’t like (yep there’s plenty of empty race humour) who one Christmas wishes his teddy bear would come to life and be his friend. The wish is granted and Ted comes to life and becomes a short lived celebrity. Thirty years later and the novelty has worn off but John (Mark Whalberg) and Ted (voiced by Seth MacFarlane) are still best friends albeit spending most of their time smoking weed and watching Flash Gordon. Johns girlfriend of four years Lori (an absolute mess of a character but portrayed as well as possible by Mila Kunis) needs John to mature, and pushes for John to have Ted move out and get a job. Also on the cards is creepy Donny (Giovanni Ribisi) an obsessive fan of Ted intent on kidnapping him for his own child to play with.

Ted isn’t a good character. He curses and smokes weed but that’s it, his charisma never convinces and his wit is always dull and obvious. For a film in which the concept of this character is the driving force behind the story this is a huge weakness. Whalberg also seems to be on autopilot here and the conversations between him and the cgi Ted never feel that real, a rhythm of speech that should occur between two lifetime friends never happens. Kunis and Joel McHale as her sleazy manager Rex do what they can but suffer from underdevelopment of their characters. The main weakness in the film though is the plotting and pacing, possibly a number of scenes had to be cut for cgi reasons but a lot of the time it feels awkward, like we missed out on something and we should take it for granted that it happened, like Rex ratting out John for leaving his party, or Ted seeing Rex with Lori. MacFarlanes direction never convinces and when the last act comes it’s hard to care. MacFarlane casts the whole thing like a Jerry Bruckheimer film; every extra looks nabbed from a modelling agency only adding to the forced nature of the direction and script.

Is it funny? Well sometimes, but just not enough. There are no memorable moments but some laughs especially a house party where a childhood hero shows up, but then sometimes the jokes are just plain horrible, one particular scene making fun of raising a retarded child being a low point.

A great original concept but poorly developed and directed. Possibly a few more re-writes and a fresh director for his next project and MacFarlane could produce a great comedy, but for now it’s back to TV.

2 out of 5

Grabbers – fun but not as fun as it should’ve been

A call-back to the films of our youth, Gremlins, Tremors,  ET, combine it with a slasher film, add in a small Irish island, drunken priests and plenty of Guinness and Grabbers looks set to be a cheesy guilty pleasure. In fairness when it shines it’s fantastic, brilliantly designed creatures, plenty of Irish quirks, but it all ends up just not being as fun as it really should be.

Rookie Garda Nolan (Ruth Bradley) arrives on idyllic Erin Island to work alongside Garda O’Shea (Richard Coyle) an alcoholic local bored of the lack of activity on the quiet island. The tranquillity is soon disturbed by visitors from the sky intent on sucking the blood from the locals, but only if the locals can remain sober enough for their blood not to be toxic. Cue a lock-in of epic proportions and pesky aliens galore.

When the film moves to the pub the pace picks up and the action and horror combine brilliantly. The film may have worked better had it been set over just one night in the pub. The preceding hour just feels like procrastination as we are introduced to fun but predictable characters and we learn little about the aliens. The first hour follows the same old structure we’re used to from horror films cutting together scenes of characters we care little for being attacked by an unseen creature with next day scenes of the police trying to figure out what happened but learning nothing surprising. Yes there’s some nice comedy in there but it just isn’t enough to distract from the formulaic.

Where the film works best is the effects, rarely on display due to a small budget but when the aliens are finally revealed they look great, particularly the huge tentacled beast that rolls like a wheel, fantastic work. The acting is surprisingly good too particularly Ruth Bradley as Garda Nolan who creates a very likeable edge to what could have easily been a boring character.

There’s some promising elements here but the imagination has all went into the design not the execution. No memorable deaths or gore to put its stamp on the genre but hopefully we see more from this team in the future, with a proper budget and a better script they could produce something memorable.

2 out of 5

The Dark Knight Rises – farewell to The Batman

Big on ambition and scale The Dark Knight Rises is as entertaining as a Batman film should be allowing itself to let it’s hair down and run amok much more than its predecessors which refused to in favour of staying more grounded. Director Nolan delivers an epic story that although riddled with plot holes is a satisfactory end to his trilogy.

I admit I didn’t get the fuss over The Dark Knight. I admired it’s difference to the current Marvel output template of generic superhero films but found the whole thing a bit dull. Nolan built a very real world with very real people which worked fantastic until a guy in a rubber suit showed up. It was all too real with no comic edge which prevented me from buying into the story of a man dressed as a bat. Possibly the reason The Dark Knight Rises works so well is that for the majority of the film a fully suited Batman is nowhere to be seen. This is more about Bruce Wayne and the citizens of Gotham than it is about a superhero and for that it works amazingly well.

Starting with a plane hijacking we are introduced to villain Bane (Tom Hardy) a bizarrely masked man intent on bringing chaos to Gotham City through isolation and martial law. Gotham has been safe for years and Batman no longer exists, leaving Bruce Wayne skinny and hobbling around his mansion. After much soul searching Batman reappears and with the help of rookie cop Blake (Joseph Gordon-Levitt) and a lot of interference from ‘Cat burglar’ Selina Kyle (Anne Hathaway) goes on a mission to once again protect his beloved Gotham. Bane is no pushover though and Batman isn’t as young as he used to be, finding himself at a loss to protecting Gotham.

The bigger the story the harder it is to not have gaps, sometimes epic gaps, and The Dark Knight Rises has them galore, but if you’re willing to forgive these, which you should in appreciation of an ambitious story you don’t usually see in Hollywood, this is fine entertainment. The two and a half hour plus running time flies by with plenty of story, characters and set pieces to keep us watching. There’s never a dull moment with another plot point to be revealed or action to excite. Nolan does not hold back allowing himself and his writers to indulge and deliver a film with no limitations.

Bale gives a great performance as both Bruce Wayne and Batman showing an older incarnation of the man battling with old age and lack of knee cartilage finding himself crippled by Bane. I’m not a huge Tom Hardy fan and despite a lot of the negative criticism of his role in this film I found both him and the character excellent. It was always going to be tough to follow Heath Ledgers Joker but Bane delivers. The first time he spoke I did question the voice a bit but as the film went on this grew on me and I found the character threatening, physical and devious, a very entertaining villain. Hathaway was fine as Catwoman but I didn’t buy into her integration into the story finding her scenes a bit lazily written, and as for Michael Caine I’m convinced he can only play Michael Caine. Joseph Gordon-Levitt should see his stock rise after this as he gives a fine performance as good cop Blake intent on sticking to doing the right thing.

There are some very cheesy lines and plot holes big enough to make a bat cave out of, but for the most part this is great entertainment and a satisfactory end to Nolans trilogy. There’ll be a reboot, I’m sure, a studio won’t leave a money making machine like this rest, but it’ll have a tough time living up to this. Farewell to the Batman.

4 out of 5